Starting school is a big step. There are some steps you can take to help your child settle in and feel confident in this new chapter of their lives. There will be help for your child at school, if they need it, with toileting, dressing and meal times but helping them do this themselves without help will boost their self-esteem and confidence. Take small steps at first. Praise and encourage your child throughout and give them enough time to practise. Your health visitor can offer guidance and support if you would like support to help your child reach these steps.
Your child:
- is happy to be away from you for periods of time in the day
- can wipe their nose, go to the toilet, wipe themselves, and flush without any help
- can ask for help if they feel unsure or not well
- can recognise their own name written down
- can use a knife and fork and open their lunch by themselves
- put their uniform on and take it off again. Use easy fastening shoes and clothes to begin with
- is used to their new morning routines, including getting dressed and eating breakfast
- is used to playing with and sharing with other children
- has a good bedtime routine so they're not tired at school
- has had their all their pre-school vaccinations including their first and second dose MMR vaccination to protect them against measles, mumps and rubella. The MMR vaccine is a safe and effective combined vaccine. Contact your GP to book any vaccinations needed.
Bliss offers support to parents whose children were born prematurely as they continue to grow and start their school life.
You can work on mark making, letters and numbers with your child. When children start to learn to scribble and draw they try lots of different grasps and often change hands. Let them experiment; the most important thing at this stage is that they have fun. You may notice their mark making becomes more purposeful and their colouring neater. This helps them to hold a pencil correctly ready for developing handwriting at school. Your child can practise recognising numbers from one to ten. Can they find individual numbers on the telephone, remote control or clock? Do they know their own house number? BBC Teach have some great counting songs to help your child practise.
Helping your child acquire basic dressing and undressing skills will help them at school and make getting out in the mornings less stressful. There will also be help for your child at school, if they need it, with toileting, dressing and meal times but helping them do this themselves without your help will boost their self-esteem and confidence. Take small steps at first and ask your child to try to put their own socks on. Praise and encourage your child throughout and give them enough time to practise. Try and work on buttons, zips or other fastenings.
Children learn through play so it’s important to have fun whatever activities you do. Pacey and BBC Bitesize have lots of fun activities to help give children the confidence and skills to start school successfully and enjoy their first year.
Communication and social skills
Encourage your child to ask questions or for help from adults or their peers. You could practice greeting people by saying hello to their toy or dolly. Practice conversations by giving your child time to speak as well as getting them to wait and listen while others speak. Turn taking games such as snakes and ladders encourages children to wait their turn.
When your child starts school, their name will be on all of their belongings so it will be really beneficial to begin looking at the letters within your child’s own name. You could begin by putting your child’s name on their bedroom door so they familiarise themselves with it. If the whole name is too much for your child then you could concentrate on the first letter. You could begin by looking for the letter around your own home such as on food labels, magazines and books.
Preparing emotionally
It is normal for your child to be apprehensive, worried or anxious about starting school or nursery. Anxiety is a feeling of unease, such as fear or worry and is an understandable response to a significant change in their routine.
Listen to your child’s worries if they have any. Reassure them you understand with phrases like “I know you’re a bit worried” and tell them you'll miss them too. You could try talking about your time at school, you could show them some of your old school photos; you can read books together about starting school, visit the library and see what you can borrow for free. Together, come up with some situations they can look forward to, such as being with their friends, meeting their new teacher and learning new things. A nice tip is to draw a heart on their wrist and one on yours too. If they are missing you they can press the heart and know that you will feel it. Tell them you’ll press yours too.
Download the Born to Move app for more tips, activities and resources to support you and your child on their next big adventure. Ring your local Health Visiting Team for more support and advice (Monday to Friday 9am-5pm)
You may be feeling different emotions about your child starting school. Congratulate yourself on all the hard work you have put into your child’s development throughout the early years and reflect on how much you and your child have accomplished. It is natural that you may feel anxious, but by promoting and encouraging your child’s independence on the months leading up to them starting school, it will allow you both to gain confidence for this next milestone.
Useful resources
- BBC – tips for starting school with your favourite CBeebies characters.
- BBC Bitesize – is free online study support resource for school-age pupils in the UK.
- Born to Move – Download for lots of useful tips to help you and your child be ready to start school confident and ready to learn.
- KELSI – is an online resource for education professionals in Kent.
- Kent County Council – find out more about applying for child’s school place at the website.
- Pacey – Professional Association for Childcare and Early Years is a charity and membership organisation based in London and working in England and Wales.